Announcements

The official MaulerMania Video has been posted!

Thanks for sending your pictures! They have been posted to the MaulerMania page. Pictures from MaulerMania can continue to be submitted via email to: themaulersrock@gmail.com.

Welcome to the new maulers.com!

Offline since 2007, the website is back- renewed, rejuvenized, reanimated and resurrected for your browsing pleasure. If you already know about the Maulers, then the return of the website will be like getting reacquainted with a long lost friend. On the other hand, you could be asking the question: Who the fuck are the Maulers? Don't worry, read on and all your questions will be answered.

The old site was a multi-page, database driven behemoth using a PERL coded backend with plenty of JavaScript for good measure. There will no longer be any of that, now there is exactly one page, this one. All the necessary information is here, just keep scrolling down. Thanks for visiting and enjoy the new maulers.com!

Part 1: The Complete (and Mostly True) Story of the Maulers
It's been said the Maulers are "the greatest band that never was" and that sums it up quite well. The Maulers are fairly well known in and around the Quincy, IL area where, as an air band, they would occasionally perform while never playing a note of actual music. The story of the Maulers is really the story of a group of friends that grew up in Quincy, IL in the 1970s and are still friends today- we're talking 50+ years.

Early details of the Maulers are bit foggy- probably due to beer, Jack Daniels, Boone's Farm, cannabis and all of us now being in our sixties. However, at a recent gathering, the genesis was discussed, and although we don't agree on every detail, we do agree that without the Maulers we probably wouldn't be the close group of friends we are today.

In 1980, one of these friends (guess which one) bought a video camera system. This was a big deal because it cost $3000 which is about $11,000 in 2024 dollars and his parents had to co-sign the loan. This was not a camcorder that would become popular later in the decade, but a fairly large camera which connected via cable to a heavy tape deck which you wore over your shoulder. It was put to good use by videotaping sketches and short films with such catchy titles such as "Creatures From the Creek" and "Wrath of the Spleen Manglers."
Another of the friends was a drummer (again, guess which one) and there was a room in his house with a drum kit and other instruments lying around. Someone suggested we should videotape ourselves pretending to play some music and AC/DC's Back in Black (released July 1980) was chosen. Three songs were recorded and it's agreed they were: "Back in Black", "You Shook Me All Night Long" and "Have a Drink on Me" which are the first three songs on side two of the album. At the conclusion of the recording session, the guy on the bass said "So, what do we call this? The Maulers?" Sadly, this first performance was eventually taped over, perhaps with an episode of Gilligan's Island, but the Maulers had their beginning.
Although the first performance was a year or so away, it didn't stop the friends from creating content for the Maulers. A logo was drawn, the band members were given names (more on this below) and titles of songs and albums were created making use of double entendre whenever possible. The clichés, stereotypes and excesses of the rock and roll lifestyle were clearly front and center in the development of the Maulers- it became our parody of all things rock and roll.

You may be thinking- "Gee, this kinda sounds like Spinal Tap." We would agree to an extent, but we thought of it first around 1980 or so which predates the great Rob Reiner film by about four years, so fuck off.

Rock and roll clichés covered off on over the years include smashing guitars, riding a motorcycle onto the stage, guitars that shoot pyro, doing shots on stage and a few minor burns from the pyro effects. Because the Maulers care about their fans, they would sometimes distribute free condoms to the fans using an air cannon. To ensure safe travels home, a "Drive Safely" reminder would be stapled to the front.

Oh, almost forgot to mention, there also had to be pyrotechnics- lots of pyrotechnics.

Part 2: Meet the Maulers (and Supporting Characters)
Peter Thruster (Peter Thrustaciola)- Vocals

We realize it's a juvenile double entendre made up by guys with an average age of about 20 at the time. Now our average age is about 64 and we make no apologies. Pete is a combination of the great front men of rock- Johnson, Tyler, DLR, Halford with an extra helping of Jim Dandy.

Pete and Alex wishing a fan Happy Birthday.

Alex Vas Deferenz- Guitar

Alex and his brother, Eddie Vas Deferenz, were founding members of the Maulers. We absolutely borrowed this from the soundtrack of Monty Python and the Holy Grail where a nuclear scientist named Reginald Vas Deferens is referenced (0:21). Because of this, we would sometimes refer to a certain band as Vas Deferens. It is unknown why the ending "s" was changed to "z" except it looks more bad ass.

Leonard "Bitch" Pastey- Guitar

After the first couple of performances, the friend who was Eddie Vas Deferenz decided his life needed a new direction and no longer wanted to participate. So EVD was retired, written out of the story and replaced with Bitch Pastey. The friend that stepped in to fill the role did not get a choice in the name, it was sort of assigned to him.

Slats Magnum (Andrew Magnuminopoulis)- Bass

Slats came from Slats Grobnik a character created by Mike Royko of the Chicago Tribune and Magnum from Jeff Magnum of the punk band Dead Boys. Magnum P.I. premiered on December 11, 1980 on CBS the show writers were probably fans of the Dead Boys as well. Slats has been described as the "rudest man alive" and he takes great pride in living up to that honor.

Jim Smith- Drums

There is no recollection by anyone on the origin or reasoning why the drummer was named Jim Smith and we have agreed to never discuss it again.

Pictures of Jim Smith are not currently available and it is unclear if his name can legally be on this web site.

Supporting Characters

This is the last known photo of Eddie Vas Deferenz before his disappearance. From the left are: Peter Thruster (crotch enhanced), Deryk St. Derrick, Eddie and Slats Magnum.

If this picture looks somewhat familiar, here's where we got the inspiration.

Over the years other supporting characters were created. One of the nice things about it not being real is you can just make shit up as necessary. It was determined the Maulers needed a production company which became Penisaurus Productions (later Penisaurus Worldwide). Here's a Commercial from 2000.

Again, this was borrowed and repurposed for our own use. Where did it come from? IYKYK. Deryk St. Derrick was added as the Manager of the Maulers and is in charge of the Penisaurus empire and he occasionally fills in when Bitch is absent. He immediately hired his friend Harv Crater as Production Manager and Harv can be spotted at Mauler shows stage right pushing the pyro buttons.

When the Maulers needed a horn section, it was provided by Methane James and the Toxic Flames. When a lounge lizard type was needed for an opening act, we welcomed Tony Riviera (who's performed for hundreds of people) and who can forget about the Maulers two groupies- Inga and Swetlana. Then there's Wolfie Vas Deferenz who performed with his uncle Alex at "The End" in 2021.

Special thanks to the ladies that have appeared as the pregnant Girl Scouts, the Saturday (SAAYTURD) Girls, the Shake Weight Girls, Go-Go Dancers and the St. Mauli Girl.

Before starting the next next section, here's some pictures from the archive.

Part 3: The "Real" Stars of the Show
First, we would like to answer some questions.

Why would you guys continue to do this after all these years? You're not getting any younger, you know. To have fun.

Why would people take time out of their lives to come watch a band that doesn't even really play their instruments? To have fun.

Why would real bands and musicians play for free and agree to be the opening act for a band that isn't real? To have fun.

So we would like to say thank you and acknowledge all the bands and musicians that participated over the years. You were the reason Mauler shows were a success and why so many people showed up. It should be noted that many of these bands/ musicians have played at multiple Mauler events.

Stain
Whole Nine Yards
Red Hot Ruby
Dynamo Humm
Porselain
Longshot
The Strange
Brien Murphy
Steve Herrington
The Deciders
Rodney Hart
Jonny 7
Hartlyss and Hartless
Ted Holt
Pete Magliocco
Marcy Inman Phillips
Keith Franks
The Sixteen Strings
Human Element
Cameran
Midnite Cruze
Flat Wrabit
The Pat Riot Act
Boosh!
The Availables
To the left: The list of real bands/ musicians that played at Mauler shows over the years.

To the right: Made up band names used to sometimes (usually) pad the lineup.

WypeThrice
Dutch Oven
The Fux
Who Stabbed Jerry
The Festers
Tacklebox
The Wagenmasters
Der VagenMeisters
Zog
Lord Squatney
The Harshmellows
Dandysnatch
Diarrhea Jim
Stool Magnet
The Napster Division
Hitler's Camaro
Switchpiss
Lumps of It
Too Much Hair
Sack Wagon
Shaggy Fudge
Murder of Cows
Viper Figgis
Lipshitz
WhöreMönger
J Christ
Part 4: All Songs Ever Performed by the Maulers
You asked for it! The complete list of all songs performed by the Maulers over the years. Guaranteed to be 100% accurate because if it wasn't, you wouldn't know it. Several of these songs were performed multiple times over the years: Kickstart, American Band, Deuce, Rocker, Boom Boom and Bad Motor Scooter to name a few.

Song Count: 71

Cover Versions: 25

Bands with 3 or more songs on the list:

Van Halen- 7
Kiss- 7
Aerosmith- 6
Cheap Trick- 4
Sammy Hagar- 3
AC/DC- 3

Rocker, Whole Lotta Rosie, Let There be Rock - AC/DC

Toys in the Attic, Nine Lives, What it Takes, Road Runner (Bo Diddley cover), Baby Please Don't Go, Helter Skelter (Beatles cover) - Aerosmith

Barracuda (Heart cover) - Adrenaline Mob

Elected, School's Out - Alice Cooper

Hip to be a Sandman (Metallica and Huey Lewis and the News mashup) - Bill McLintock

Rebel Yell - Billy Idol

Hello There, Day Tripper (Beatles cover), Surrender, Can't Stop the Music, Clock Strikes 10 - Cheap Trick

King Contrary Man - The Cult

Join Together (Who cover) - Dead Daisies

Baba O'Reilly (Who cover) - Dropkick Murphys

I Want to Hold Your Hand (Beatles cover) - Emmett Lee Stang

Stone Blue - Foghat

All my Life, Fortunate Son (with John Fogarty) - Foo Fighters

Back to Wentzville - George Thorogood and The Destroyers

99 Red Ballons (Nena cover) - Goldfinger

Hair of the Dog (Nazareth cover) - Guns N' Roses

Rockin' at Midnight - Honey Drippers

Barracuda Intro (Heart cover) - Jack Black

I Saw Her Standing There (Beatles cover) - John Corabi

You Got Another Thing Coming - Judas Priest

Deuce, Cold Gin, Guitar Solo from Alive!, Heaven's on Fire, Rock and Roll all Night, Rock and Roll Radio (Ramones cover), Strutter - Kiss

Ballroom Blitz (Sweet cover) - Krokus

Do You Feel Like I Do (Peter Frampton cover) - Night Ranger

BBC (Austin Powers Soundtrack) - Ming Tea

Great Balls of Fire (Jerry Lee Lewis cover) - The Misfits

Kick out the Jams (MC5 cover) - Monster Magnet

Bad Motor Scooter, Rock the Nation - Montrose

Kickstart my Heart, Smokin' in the Boys Room (Brownsville Station cover) - Mötley Crüe

Louie Louie (Kingsmen cover) - Motörhead

Saturday Night's Alright for Fighting (Elton John cover) - Nickelback

Boom Boom Out Go the Lights, Whole Lotta Rosie (AC/DC cover) - Pat Travers Band

Talk Dirty to Me - Poison

Do You Feel Like I Do (Peter Frampton cover) - Night Ranger

Metal Health - Quiet Riot

We're an American Band (Grand Funk Railroad cover) - Rob Zombie

Red, Mas Tequila, There's Only One Way to Rock, My Generation (Who cover) - Sammy Hagar

Help (Beatles cover) - Silverstein

Fat Bottomed Girls (Queen cover) - Small Town Titans

Rock and Roll High School (Ramones cover) - Tommy and the Rockets

Eruption (Van Halen cover on banjo) - The Reverend Ed Broms

Uncontrollable Urge (Devo cover) - Van Goat

Panama, Unchained, Big Fat Money, Ain't Talkin' 'bout Love, Hot for Teacher, Rock and Roll (Led Zepplin cover), There's Only One Way to Rock - Van Halen

Part 5: 40+ Years of Live Performances
Disclaimer: When we say live, we mean the Maulers were actually present and it should not be inferred they were actually playing music. Much like the recent trend of members Mötley Crüe, Kiss and the Eagles performing live but not actually playing the music. Maybe the Maulers were ahead of their time?

1981- 1986 The Beginning

The first performances were Quincy College air band contests followed by performances at The Landing at Mark Twain Lake, Puzzles Pub, Quincy Motor Inn, an air band contest in Kirksville and several appearances as special guests of the (real) band Black Tie. After 1986, the Maulers disappeared for over 10 years.

1997- 2000 If You Build a Stage, They Will Come

There was a man named Lloyd who had a huge backyard in rural Quincy that had a natural slope away from the back of the house. A stage was built at the bottom of the hill and his backyard was transformed into Lloyd's Amphitheater. This was the home of five events in four years: Maulerpalooza (1997), Maulerstock (1998), Mauloween (1998), Maullennium (1999) and Lloyd's Monsters of Rock (2000).

These were festival type events where local musicians and bands were invited to perform. Music would usually start mid-afternoon with the Maulers going on around 10:00 for their electrifying 15-20 minute set.

It was during this time that the internet really took off. In 1997 the domain maulers.com was registered and the website was created to bring the Maulers into cyberspace. We created content and tried to keep it fresh for about 10 years but when there were no updates for over a year the decision was made to take down the site around 2007. Fortunately, the registration was kept current and maulers.com is back and it's back with a fucking vengeance.

In the decade after the shows at Lloyd's Amphitheater, there would be only one performance which was at South Side Boat Club- Mauloween '05.

2010-2024 The Swinegrass Years

There was a nice couple who lived in a barn on a farm near Camp Point, IL. They decided to get married in 2010 and asked the Maulers to perform at their wedding reception. After that, a stage was constructed (picture right) and Swinegrass, as the farm was named, hosted several events including Live at Swinegrass (2013), Sheer Shart Attack (2014), Mauleroo (2016), Stinko de Maulo (2018), The End (2021) and MaulerMania (2024). These continued the tradition of festival type events featuring local musicians and bands with the Maulers closing out the evening.

Part 6: The Offical Timeline 1981-2024 (43 Years if you are Counting)
The Early Years

Unfortunately, not much media from the early days has survived. The pictures to the right are screen shots from the Maulers "Bad Motor Scooter" video made in the early '80s on high quality VHS.

Here is a link to the Bad Motor Scooter video.

There was not good record keeping during this time. Although the venues are known (listed above), the exact dates are uncertain.

Another video from Puzzles Pub in 1983.

Maulerpalooza

November 1, 1997

Lloyd's Amphitheater

Maulerpalooza was the triumphant return of the Maulers after a 10+ year absence and was the first of five shows at Lloyd's Amphitheater.

Alex premiered his signature guitar, the "Flying VD", at this event which he still uses to this day.

Maulerstock

June 27,1998

Lloyd's Amphitheater

The first of two shows during 1998, Maulerstock built on the success of Maulerpalooza and the pyrotechnics were upgraded for this and future events.

This video shows the stage set up at Lloyd's which included a huge projection screen with some pyro for good measure.

Mauloween

October 10,1998

Lloyd's Amphitheater

Mauloween was the second event of 1998 and there would be no more years with multiple shows.

Here's a video typical of a closing finale of a show at Lloyd's.

Maullennium

July 10,1999

Lloyd's Amphitheater

Bitch Pastey was unable to attend so Deryk St. Derrick filled in and amazingly sounded exactly the same as Bitch. St. Derrick would continue to fill in as needed which was fine with him because in addition to his usual 87.5%, he could also claim 20% of the remaining 12.5% artist's share.

This was the first show billed as "the Maulers final performance".

Lloyd's
Monsters of Rock

July 15, 2000

Lloyd's Amphitheater

The fifth and last show at Lloyd's was named for the man himself. It was recognition well deserved for hosting five of these events.

Mauloween '05

October 29, 2005

South Side
Boat Club

The Maulers came out of retirement at the request of the organizer of the event and afterwards would disappear for another five years.

Listen to the radio ad for the event.

Youtube Video Links
Kickstart My Heart
Saturday Night's Alright
Eruption on Banjo

Private Event

October 30, 2010

The Lakeside
Wedding Pavilion
at Swinegrass

The nice couple who owned Swinegrass Farm lured the Maulers out of retirement with the promise of wedding cake and free drinks.

After the wedding, negotiations were ongoing to bring the Maulers back to Swinegrass and eventually all parties were in agreement but it took almost three years.

Live at Swinegrass

July 6, 2013

The Stage
at Swinegrass

This was the first show at the newly constructed Stage at Swinegrass and the Maulers didn't disappoint with their high energy seventeen minute set.

Here's the video of the show.

To open a large version of the poster click here.

Sheer Shart Attack

June 28, 2014

The Stage
at Swinegrass

Show was moved inside due to expected weather and it proved to be a good call as the sky opened up as soon as the Maulers finished their set.

This was the first time since 1999 and 2000 there were shows in consecutive years and that would never happen again.

To open a large version of the poster click here.

Mauleroo

June 25, 2016

The Stage
at Swinegrass

Mauleroo was the biggest production to date and the benchmark for all future shows.

Here is the complete Mauleroo video with intro and includes the meme "Hitler Gets Mauler Tickets".

To open a large version of the poster click here.

Stinko de Maulo

June 30, 2018

The Stage
at Swinegrass

Stinko de Maulo continued the success of the previous Swinegrass shows and the fans were not disappointed.

To open a large version of the poster click here.

The End

September 11, 2021

The Stage
at Swinegrass

Called The End because it was absolutely going to be the final performance even though that was also said of the previous eight shows.

The End Full Show

The End Celebrity Intro

To open a large version of the poster click here.

MaulerMania

September 7, 2024

Camp Point
Slackerdome

Declaring The End was the end didn't really work out too well. So strap yourself in and get really for one more!

The official MaulerMania Video has been posted!

Four days after the show, there's already a shit-load of pics posted on the MaulerMania page.

On the right is the top part of the poster. What, there's more? There sure is- click here to view.






Part 7: Let's Wrap This Up Already
Someone once described a Maulers performance as "five guys pretending to play music during a fireworks display." While there is a truth to that, we would like to think we did it quite well and probably better than anyone else has ever done it (if anyone else has ever done it). At one show at Lloyd's in the late 90's attendance reached around 1000 people and in Quincy, you could very well run into someone wearing a Maulers t-shirt or maybe a fan from Quincy on vacation in Florida.

It's rewarding to know that so many people got the joke, appreciated the humor and had a good time at Mauler events over the years. Knowing people appreciated what we were doing helped us continue even as we became sexagenarians (Alex thinks this means sexy people that don't eat meat). This website serves as an online tribute to the Maulers, all the real bands and musicians that performed and everyone who attended over the years. Thank you!

Contact the bastard responsible for this website at: themaulersrock@gmail.com